Author: Michelle Kubitz

I am a 40-something fiction writer living in the Midwest with my husband and two kids. A former journalist, I like to write mysteries - sometimes with a paranormal bent. A 2017 runner up for Killer Nashville's Claymore Award, I'm a member of Sisters in Crime (National and Twin Cities) and Mystery Writers of America (MWA-Midwest).
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One

Michelle Kubitz
My baby turns a year old today. *Collective sigh*
My baby turns a year old today. *Collective sigh*

So, here’s the thing – I try really hard not to be “that mom.”  I don’t think that my kids’ poop smells like roses.  I don’t let them climb on strangers’ furniture and then praise their precociousness.  I try really hard not to dominate conversations with how stinking cute they are.  And while I think my oldest shows signs of being a burgeoning genius (he can count to 14! he knows colors! he knows letters! but he sucks with a fork! and he just turned two!), I keep most of those revelations to myself and only discuss them in whispers with my husband and the kids’ nanny.

Here’s a cliche for you:  Becoming a mom did something to me.  Yes, something beyond ensuring that my favorite jeans would never settle on my hips properly again.  Something beyond the obligatory “when I see them walking around, my heart is gallivanting outside of my body.”

Becoming a mom has changed my focus on writing.  Notice: I will never say that becoming a mom has made me a better writer. I came too close to not being able to bear children to be that kind of a twee asshole.  But I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you that motherhood changed things.  First off – reading books that “fill the well” and inspire me?  Sandra Boynton may not have the same allure as the latest Diana Gabaldon, but it’s what I’ve been reading.  Over and over and over again.  And running off to the coffee shop to sit for hours noodling on prose?  It still happens, but it’s usually a once a week thing that’s planned around bedtimes and my husband’s standing game night.

Having my eldest son paved the way for change, but Number Two pictured above was the game changer.  I was working on my manuscript for “Afterlife” up until the night before we went in for our scheduled C-section.  And then I finished the first draft of AL on the last day of my maternity leave (thanks to an amazing spouse and three mornings a week that our babysitter came to acclimate herself to two hooligans versus one).  Having my youngest son – who turns a year old today (eeek!) – ushered in the era of “getting shit done.”

Lev Grossman wrote an engaging piece on how his daughter helped him find his voice.  And talked about the challenges and frustration of trying to write in fits and spurts, but more importantly – how prior to the birth of his daughter, there were writing days where he let himself down, but with the arrival of Lily, he’d be damned if he’d let her down.  (I love this:  “Any time I wrote a sentence that was less than true I could feel her looking over my shoulder and shaking her head, slowly and sadly: Come on, Daddy. We both know that’s crap.”)

Although I spend time on Facebook narrating what I think my sons are saying with their expressions, I don’t have this image of them on my shoulders chiming in every time I make an editorial misstep.  But what I do have are two really adorable and engaging little boys that have helped me prioritize.

So – happy birthday to my youngest and last baby, my littlest bear.  And if you or your brother ever decide that you want to spend your lives stringing words together – do not let fear limit you.  Live authentically.  And the quickest way to write a novel is to park your ass in a chair and put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard, and write.

You both are my greatest inventions.

Process, Random

Filling the well

Michelle Kubitz
The men in my life on a recent trip "up north" to Duluth, Minnesota.
The men in my life on a recent trip “up north” to Duluth, Minnesota.

“Filling the well” is one of my favorite cliches and it’s one that I find circling my head space when I’m doing almost anything that gets me outdoors, away from the computer, or encourages me to think outside of my mind’s normal realms of travel.  My recent trip to visit a friend?  I got a lot of work done on AL, but I also got a chance to revisit some favorite haunts that may or may not appear sometime in the future in my fiction.  The occasional nights out that I have with old co-workers?  Sometimes it is tempting to say no, but I work from home.  I don’t interact with as many people as I once did and I find that those nights are usually filled with little moments where I see something that I can use in a story – usually moments or quirks that I can put in my characters.

This past weekend, my husband and I took a road trip up to Superior, WI / Duluth, MN to show our sons the Aerial Lift Bridge and watch some big ships come into the bay.

I am officially one chapter behind on the progress I’ve been making on AL edits, but this was good.  And if you ever read a story of mine that involves a precocious two-year-old saying “oh no!” when Mommy hits the brakes too hard, it’s a moment from my own well.

Process, Random

This week’s goals

Michelle Kubitz
  • Rearrange editing calendar
  • Finish character list
  • Compare notes from v2 and v3
  • Look at notebook

I’m already behind.  But I’m making consistent progress on AL and after 10 hours of driving over the weekend to see a very dear friend of mine, I made a ton of progress on version 3. 

How do I make progress while driving?  Well, first off – very carefully.  Basically, what I do is retell the story in my head as I’m driving along.  I throw out the niggling issues that are causing me heartburn and asking questions.  Mainly … am I making things harder than they need to be?  And honestly – if you’re asking yourself this question, the answer is probably a resounding “yes!”  Some sketched out items for backstory were cut in favor of simplicity.  I figured out how to tighten the pace (that was a huge “a-ha!” moment that had me pulling over in the next town and scribbling madly in my notebook). 

I also finished my complete readthrough of version 3.  Here’s a picture of Sunday morning and the glorious three hours that I had transcribing the notes that I had scribbled while reading:

20140831_085617
Progress!

I’ll share the story regarding the motel I had been staying in at a later date.  While the place was dated, it was clean and the coffee was good and plentiful.  (And it was QUIET! Yay for quiet working conditions!)

In the meantime – this is what else is going on in this world:

Listening to: Vintage Ricky Skaggs and a new find.

Reading: I have a whole host of books that need to be consumed … one of those is going to be J.T. Ellison’s latest. 

Happy September, friends!

Fiction, Process

Plan your work, work your plan

Michelle Kubitz

20140729_100849I completed the second draft edits of “Afterlife.” To give you a clue at the lack of fanfare regarding this event, my husband doesn’t even know that.  And in his defense – I just decided that I was done with the edits on Sunday night after about a week’s lull of activity regarding my WIP.  I was sitting at my desk when it hit me … I’m done with the second round of edits.  In fact, I had finished edits when I was in a hotel room in Colorado the week before.

But this should also give you an idea of how long I still have to go with AL.  The internal deadline I had set for myself with AL was that she’d be ready for beta readers by the fall.  Conservatively, I’d say that she’ll be ready closer to Christmas.  There are still some holes, there are some exciting things that I discovered during the second round of edits that I’m going to go back and flesh out.

Next steps?  Mentally, I decided that I finished the second round of edits on July 18th.  I’m giving AL a month to rest and then I’m picking her up again for version 3.  (As you can see in the photo above, I have the binder for v3 all ready!)

Here’s what I’ll be doing in the meantime:

  • Reading “Write Your Novel From the Middle” by James Scott Bell.  The middle of my novel has issues.  There’s some pacing concerns that I’ve grappled with during v2, so I’m hoping that this helps.
  • Dammit … I wanted this to be a bulleted list.  And to be honest, that’s really the only thing I’m doing in preparation for v3.  There are other things that I’ve done to further AL.  Those include (subbullets!)
    • Reread a lot of Patricia Briggs … Mercy Thompson is one of my favorite characters in paranormal literature. Plus, the way that Briggs presents her stories in the same POV that AL is in.  It’s a good primer to see what I want to accomplish with my own work.
    • Finished rereading Elizabeth Lowell’s “Always Time to Die.”  For some reason, that novel has been stuck in my head and I re-read it on my flight back and forth to Colorado.  I tried to pay particular attention to how Lowell unfolded “ATtD” because she has a lot of story threads moving through this novel and I wanted to see how she managed all of them and still presented a pretty gripping story.  (Even if some of the romantic dialogue leaned heavily towards the cheese territory.)

Starting August 18th, I’ve taken three days of PTO from work and I’m going to devote that time to kickstarting round three of edits.  My goal is to complete that round of edits by October 11th.  It’s ambitious, but not impossible.

In the meantime, I’m going to take my hiatus from AL to switch gears and start outlining a story that I started a few years back.  I have a big problem with starting and abandoning projects.  As a result, I have about four orphaned stories that I’ve been working on over the past 10 years or so.  This story (the working title is “Summoned”) is one that has been niggling at my brain lately and I’m very much looking forward to going down that path again and setting up a road map that I can refer to when I go back to writing that particular tale.

Plan your work, work your plan … Happy Tuesday, everyone!

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Daily Habits

Michelle Kubitz

When I was an undergraduate, I took a creative writing class where the professor stressed the need to write daily. “Writing daily is like going out to the seashore every morning and gathering seashells,” he had said (this is me paraphrasing here). “You never know what treasures you’re going to find. But you need to go out every day.”

To be honest – I was kind of an asshole in college and I didn’t really like my professor all that much, so I doubt I raised my hand as I puffed up in youthful arrogance and said: “Well, why wouldn’t you just wait until the ideas come to you?”

I took the wind out of my professor’s sails (I was puffed up with youthful arrogance, he was staring meaningfully out the window having one of his moments where he was probably congratulating himself on molding the minds of young writers) and he looked at me in annoyance for interrupting his “moment” and with a little bit of pity.

Some 15 years later, I can admit two things: 1) I was insufferable in college. 2) He was right.

But here’s what my professor didn’t explain adequately (or maybe he did, but I had shut down and was daydreaming about my latest unrequited love or wondering if it was taquito day in the Caf). How do you carve time out of your day, put butt in chair, and write?   How do you weed through the distractions and not put writing off until tomorrow.  Or a better time?

Let’s have a moment of honesty here, shall we?  First and foremost, a lot of us who write fiction also hold down day jobs. I’m a proposal writer. I’ve also been an executive assistant, I’ve worked at a cab company, I worked in newspapers. Before that, I was a college student and I worked during college as well.  Work – it takes up a shit ton of time.

Also – if we are lucky beings, we are surrounded with people that we love. We are wives, husbands, parents, siblings – we are human beings who have obligations to others. I have two children under two, I have my own grumpy cat, and I have a wonderful husband who gets that there’s a weird piece of my persona that has told myself stories since a young age and that the woman he married has enough chutzpah to think that someday she might be able to produce something publishable.

What I’m saying is this: Life gets in the way. My life is full of deadlines and distractions. It is easy for me to get discouraged when my mind feels like the words I’m rearranging are shit. I’ve been dealing with a plot problem lately that makes me want to hurl. But I go down to the effing seashore every day and try to pluck godforsaken shells off of the sand.

And last night, I had one of those moments where my pen was zipping across the page of my notebook and my mind was ALIGHT with words and images. There were still distractions – my kids are young and they don’t like to sleep through the night. I was feeling guilty that I was downstairs writing while my husband was getting up and tending to their needs. But I took the time to satisfy the muse and to capture the moments that I needed in an outline so I could harness some of the magic when I had time to return to the page today. (And I’ll do something nice for my husband today. Or sometime in the future. Baked goods work. Dairy Queen treats work even better.)

So today as I was committing my notebook scrawls to Microsoft Word, I had a thought. And it was that the daily* practice that I’ve adhered to bore fruit last night. I was faithful to my practice and I was rewarded. And I think I have enough to power through my shitty first draft (SFD) and wrap it up by month’s end. But even if it stalls and I feel like digging my eyes out with my bare hands, I’ll still show up. Because my book won’t write itself.

“People on the outside think there’s something magical about writing, that you go up in the attic at midnight and cast the bones and come down in the morning with a story, but it isn’t like that. You sit in back of the typewriter and you work, and that’s all there is to it.” – Harlan Ellison

***

This post was prompted, in part, by this piece in The Kill Zone.

* – A note on my “daily” practice.  I do try to write every day.  However, I also have “other things” going on from time to time.  This weekend it is a reunion of some old friends.  Last weekend, it was a birthday party for one of my lovely nieces.  In these cases, I always bring my project notebook with me.  I never know when inspiration is going to strike and it usually serves as a talisman so I don’t lose momentum.

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The wooshing sounds of deadlines …

Michelle Kubitz

I had set an internal deadline of finishing edits on my Shitty First Draft (SFD) by July 1.  It is July 1.  And I’m about four chapters, give or take, behind.  However – I am not bummed by missing this deadline.  I have two children under the age of two that are running afoot, I work full time, and I really like spending time with my husband and other family members; I’m cutting myself a little bit of slack.  And that’s partially because I’m confident that I’m not far away from finishing my edits.

What’s next?  I’m wavering between giving my story some time to rest and marinate (what does that even MEAN?) or going right back into more edits.  I think I’m going to give it a little rest, partially to give myself some objective distance, but mostly because there’s another project that’s been niggling at my gray matter and I want to do some outlining on that before I return to my edits.  I worry about losing my momentum, but my instinct is telling me that I’m going to be OK as long as I return to AL before August 15th. 

In other news – I’m reading again.  When I’m writing, my reading habit becomes feast or famine.  And if I do read, I want to read something that I’ve read before (It’s my brain’s version of comfort food?  I’m really strange?  All of the above?),  I’m out of my famine mode and back into feasting on books.  I’m back to reading Patricia Briggs’ “Mercy Thompson” series and restarted the “Alpha and Omega” series.  I love the world that Briggs created with these characters – again, mental comfort food.  I’m also reading books on the Russian empire – Robert K. Massie’s “Catherine the Great” and Edvard Radzinsky’s “The Last Tsar.”  I’ve been minorly obsessed with the Romanovs since high school.  And like my penchant for mental comfort food, I cannot explain why I am drawn to those eras in history and that country. 

Happy July, friends!

Fiction, Random

A sense of belonging

Michelle Kubitz

MWAAt the tail end of last week, I submitted my memberships into the following organizations:  Sisters in Crime and the Twin Cities chapter of Sisters in Crime.  Tomorrow, my loving husband will send out my membership application for Mystery Writers of America (MWA).

What do I hope to get out of these memberships?  Does this bring me one step closer to publishing my novel?  I’ve always been hesitant about sharing my work with other people, so why am I clamoring to join associations that will bring me closer to other writers and maybe (GASP!) cause me to share my word-babies with the universe?

I’m not sure what the answers are to these questions.  But in the meantime, this is something that I’ve done for me.  I’m putting my money where my mouth is and I’m taking steps towards the goals I’ve set for myself.

Book Review, Process

Book Review – The Virgin’s Guide to Writing Your First Romance Novel

Michelle Kubitz

The first time that I ever encountered Elda Minger’s books was at the CashWise Grocery Store in Willmar, Minnesota.  I worked an evening shift that went from 1 to 10 p.m., and frequently went there to unwind.  I’d usually have a couple things that I needed to purchase, but more often than not I was more interested in reading the magazines and checking out book covers.

And that is where I found Elda Minger’s books *mumblemumblemumblemumble.”

Oh wait.  This is the part of my blog where I hesitantly acknowledge that I’ve read (and enjoyed) Harlequin romance novels.  So – back in the early aughts, I bought Elda Minger’s “Night Rhythms” at CashWise and although many of the other Harlequin’s I’ve picked up over the years have been donated or discarded, I like Minger’s book.  And I may have a major in English and my shelves may be filled with books from T.S. Eliot, Stephan King, Elia Kazan, etc., but dammit – a decent romance novel makes for great brain candy.  Especially when I can slam something like a Harlequin down in less than an afternoon.

Anyway – I was taking a long walk with my hooligans the other day and a story idea came to me – it was like a wonderful gift that kept me noodling on the possibilities of story lines, situations, and characters until I got home.  Unlike the other stories that I have burbling in my gray area, there’s nothing paranormal or mysterious about this plot – in fact, it’s kind of a simple, human story.  And you know what?  It could turn itself into a decent little romantic tale.

And since I have a hard time finishing any of my projects and because I wanted to approach this story idea like I was crafting a romance, I decided to do some Googling.  And I came across Elda Minger’s “The Virgin’s Guide to Writing Your First Romance Novel” and I downloaded a copy for my Kindle.

As I mentally composed this blog post, I found myself noodling as to why I enjoyed Minger’s “how-to” so much.  To be honest – I’m not a novice or a virgin (heh) when it comes to writing.  I’ve been writing for more than 20 years, nearly 15 of those years have been spent as a professional/paid writer (and to be honest – being able to write that is just a thrill to me).

So why did I like Minger’s book?  First and foremost – Minger has a great conversational voice.  Her book is structured in a Q&A format of the most commonly asked questions she’s fielded in her writing / teaching career.  And it really feels like having a conversation with a mentor rather than reading a tome that regurgitates the “best of” Strunk and White.  Also – her advice is spot on, whether you’re new to the craft or looking for a couple ideas to refresh your existing skills (more where I am at when I read books like Minger’s).

And finally – one of the most interesting parts of Minger’s book that I encountered in the “writing about sex” section was a very brief, but FASCINATING history that encompassed historical romances and debunked some of the common notions that people might have about romance novels.

Minger’s book was $5 well spent.  I’d recommend it to novice and intermediate writers.

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Writing / Doing – Despite an avalanche of work, I’ve had some painfully slow but pretty satisfying edits lately on AL.  I also mentioned the other story idea that came to me last week while walking.  I’ve taken some preliminary notes on that story and intend to go back and try to craft an outline in the near future.

I also have another story that I’ve worked on for the past few years.  And it seems like when things are going well with AL, this one wants to barge in and be all front and center.  (It’s kind of like watching my eldest son snatch a toy away from my youngest.  Or how my youngest child is finding his voice and crows just to drown his older brother out.)  In situations like these, I just take notes.  I have notebooks and folders (sometimes entire containers) devoted to my separate stories.  I want to get my first draft of AL edited before I start cheating on her to work on something else.

Reading – Other than Minger, I have a couple other books (well, several) downloaded on my Kindle to read sometime very soon.  The two books that are at the front of my queue are “The Book Thief” by Markus Zusak and “Make Art, Make Money: Lessons from Jim Henson on Finding Your Creative Career” by Elizabeth Hyde Stevens.

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Retreat?

Michelle Kubitz

One of my writer friends recently shared a link on Facebook that advertised a “writer’s cabin” in rural Iowa.  Basically, you pay somewhere north of $700 for a week’s stay in a fully furnished cabin that has access to wifi.  But the proprietor of the establishment specifically built this spot with writers in mind.

I have another friend of mine who used to take regular sabbaticals where he would rent a remote cabin in the Pacific Northwest and spend weeks writing.

To be honest – I love the idea of packing it up for a week or a long weekend and going somewhere quiet to write, but to be honest – I’ve also considered taking a couple work trips just so I could sleep alone for a full eight hours without having to deal with one of my children. 🙂  (Just kidding honey, if I get sent to L.A., it is going to be for work – the “sleeping alone” bit is just a bonus.)  So I don’t think my desire for a writer’s retreat comes from an honest “I’m looking to get my book done” place.  That would be the main purpose behind a retreat, but … yeah.  I think the idea of a good night’s sleep is what makes the idea of a writer’s retreat really sexy right now.

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Writing / Doing:  Edits keep moving along on AL.  I’ve been stuck on a particular chapter that I really do need quiet and peace to power through.  It’s only three chapters into my novel, but it is pivotal – it establishes relationship between two of the main characters and it propels the storyline and explains some of the “why.”  So – although I get frustrated that outlining my intentions hasn’t produced squat, I’m OK that it’s taking some time.  It’s important.  At this point, I’ve resigned myself that my idea of being done with first draft edits by April 1st was just a really, really good pipe dream.  I think July is a more appropriate date.  And once I get a couple more projects done at work and build up some more PTO, I think I’m going to take a couple days off to power through.

This is where I’ve tossed around an idea for a “DIY Writer’s Retreat.”  Do I need to go to a cabin for solitude?  Not really.  I joke about the lustful thoughts I have about sleep, but honestly – I’d miss my husband and kiddos.  But, you know what would be an easy fix?  Going to the library.  It’s free.  I live in a city where the library and other structures are connected via skyways – and the Starbucks is just a couple skyways away from my library.

Reading:  A couple friends of mine have released books:

I already read a draft of Jerry’s book, Tony’s book is on tap.  I told Jerry that I’d write a review for Amazon, but I’m
still formulating what I want to say.  I loved “Scrawny Dog,” although it confounds description.  And to be honest – although I know a lot of writers and have many friends who practice the craft, Jerry’s my mentor – his love for the craft cannot be hemmed in by a review and my appreciation of his talent comes off as one-dimensional.  I am a writer, but there are days where I know that I will spend the rest of my life trying to come up with the words that are enough to express how much he means to me as a person.

Fiction, Process, Random

Process and Parenting

Michelle Kubitz

I’ve read some really neat articles lately that feature the offices / work spaces of the “famously creative.”  This article “The Writer’s Room” is from the New York Times. The other one is from BuzzFeed and features “40 Inspiring Workspaces of the Famously Creative.”

When I was a kid, having an office seemed synonymous with Being a Big Deal.  I’m not sure where I got that from – my father was a farmer, the farm and its 100+ acres was his office.  My mom later worked in an office, but since she owned the entire building – well … my mom had an entire building.  Somewhere in my mind and in my existence, I thought to myself that if I had a space with a working door and a desk – I’d have an office.  And it would be good.

Here’s my “office.”  I ended up claiming this space as my own after turning my old office / spare bedroom into a nursery.  To be honest … it’s a pretty great space and really gets me away from it all – with the exception of the Cat.  He is perched on my worktable right now, purring.  And likely plotting.

office illustration
Click on to enlarge and view the madness!

 

Anyway, as I’m doing edits on my first draft of my novel (the working title is “After Life” [AL]), I bought a pad of those easel-size Post-It notes.  Right now, I have three up and they represent some of the main characters that are in my story and will eventually have their character arcs sketched out.  As I’ve finished my first draft of AL and its initial read-through, I realize that there’s a story there and that there are some good moments, but that there are some things that are missing. I’m hoping that if I can physically SEE the arcs and can stare at them for awhile, they’ll jolt something into being.  So yes – that sounds like a bunch of mumbo jumbo, but it’s already working.  Last night after I affixed the current Post-Its to the wall, I had a couple thoughts regarding the backstories of a couple pivotal characters.

***

The revisions to my first draft of AL have taken longer than I originally anticipated – I don’t remember what my exact deadlines were, but I adjusted accordingly.  I want the first set of revisions to be done by end of first quarter (April) and ready for beta readers by fall (October).  To be honest – I think I might be able to hit the April deadline, but I think it’s going to take a little more love and attention before I set this child out into the world to get her first round of critiques.

Part of the reason that my edits are taking longer is because my “real life” – i.e., my job as a proposal writer, has been taking a lot of my time lately.  Not only from my writing, but (more importantly) from my family.  And then there’s the reality that I’m the mom of two children under the age of 2.  God, I love them and while they are my best inventions – they are marvelously exhausting.  But here’s the thing – even though I’ve lived solo on this earth longer than I’ve been a mother, I have found that motherhood has done some interesting things to my writing.  One of the biggest things is that motherhood has helped me prioritize my time.  It’s pretty easy for me to pick and choose what social obligations I’d rather skip in favor of spending some time with AL. I’d also say something about how it’s given me greater depth of feeling, but you know?  That’s probably a bunch of bullshit.  Motherhood is part of a larger whole of me – I draw from being a mom, just like I’ve drawn from being a reporter.  I’ve even got a couple stories that came from the time that I worked as a phone operator at a cab company.  Every writer is different.  We all bring something unique and personal to the mix.

***

Writing / Doing: Setting up the Post-Its were a step in the right direction.  I got a couple ideas jotted down last night that I need to play with and see how they work in the overall arc of my story.

Reading: Still going through Geneen Roth.  Picked up a copy of J.T. Ellison’s latest novel “When Shadows Fall” on my Kindle.  I’m looking forward to reading her latest.  Also, I’ve linked to my Goodreads account on this page.  This also reflects what is on my bookshelf – both physical, Kindle, and virtual.